The Flame that Burned into Your Eyes
by Stella272
Summary: If you don't like sad fics, don't read this


_Hey everyone! I'm quite new at this, so please be nice. This fic is supposed to be sad, so if you don't like that, don't read it. And, as always, review please! _

_Disclaimer: I don't own them obviously, just using them for entertainment._

It was already ten in the morning and Chandler still hadn't begun working… Not that he was a hard-worker anyway. Nevertheless, he should have been preparing his presentation right now. But his mind was on other stuffs like…his wife. Monica and he had just had a fight about if they should go live somewhere else now that she was pregnant. Chandler smiled thinking about that: she was pregnant! He still couldn't believe it. They've tried so hard since they heard that Rachel was having a baby and Monica and he realized they wanted a child too… they've finally succeed in making her pregnant… not that it was hard work.

However, this morning, they just had a stupid argument because Monica didn't know what to do about the restaurant and Chandler told her she was selfish to think about her work before their life. He still meant that anyway but he hated when Monica and him were mad at each other, it didn't happened very frequently but still, each time, something like that came up, he couldn't possibly think about something else.

'I should just call her' Chandler thought. 'So that, I could get back to work.'  
But, he was still angry with her even more after she answered him that he was the one selfish to go to work on a Saturday when none else of the gang was working and to leave his three-month pregnant wife. He just couldn't believe she would said something like that whereas she knew that if they eventually moved away, they would need all the money he could make now.

Monica was pacing back and forth, still mad at Chandler. How come he couldn't understand that the restaurant was a dream coming true for her? Her four friends were all in there looking at her.

"Monica, are you going to be like this all day?" Ross asked.  
Monica just gave him a look.

"That's true, Mon! Come on, we'll do something fun today!" Rachel added.  
"I still can't believe he talked to me like that!" Monica said, oblivious to what Rach was telling her.  
"Come on, Mon. Either you get over it or you call him: so that, in any way, we can go have some fun after." Joey intervened.  
"If he wants to apologize, HE will have to call me. But, you're right: we can go have fun."

Monica grabbed her coat, already ready to leave.  
"So? You guys coming?

Chandler was still not working as he was wondering if he should call her or not. His thought were quickly sent away as he saw a guy coming into his office, shouting:  
"Fire! Fire! The building is on fire!"

Chandler couldn't quite believe that until he heard some screaming and shouting. He stood up and ran out of his office. There, he saw all his colleagues panicking and trying to run by the escape exit. He quickly picked his suitcase with his important files and followed them not before quickly looking at a picture of him and Monica and feeling all the love he knew he had for her. That fire would surely be something to tell her as soon as he'd get back from work and she wouldn't be able to complaint too much about him staying all day in his office either, would she? He began to go down the stairs to escape the fire but quickly saw some people coming back from where he was going.

"What's the matter? Why are you coming back?" Chandler asked one of his colleagues.  
"The fire has taken all the lower levels and is coming up here: we're stuck, we can't go down!"  
"What? What do you mean?"  
Chandler's colleague didn't answer but instead, went back to where Chandler was coming from.

When Chandler arrived upstairs, he saw about thirty people there, all looking really scared. He recognized most of them. His boss was on the emergency phone. He hung up and tried to catch everyone's attention.  
"Hey there. I was on the phone with the firemen. The fire began in the fifth level which was unoccupied. We're here on the upper and fiftieth level. The fire is already on the tenth floor: it's going slow thanks to all the fire precaution but nobody noticed it before because we're Saturday and the only floors occupied today were the forty-ninth and the fiftieth. The firemen said that they can't reach higher than the eighth floor and that they can't go through the fire either that is too strong. The fire is slow, ladies and gentlemen, and we're the further away we can be, since there is no roof… but… but…" His voice broke down and he sat down. "But, I'm afraid to announce you that we're stuck here and that nothing could save us…"

'No! He couldn't be saying what I think he's saying' Chandler thought. 'He couldn't… I'm having a child, I just got married! I've got this perfect life waiting for me downstairs and just because I chose to work on a Saturday will take that away from me? I've misunderstood, that's it… that's what it is.'  
Chandler looked around him and saw most of the people devastated, the others were just staring into space, not wanting to understand. One of the few women who were there burst out crying… she was nearly hysterical, but didn't have enough energy to really be.  
'No! No!' Chandler's mind was screaming… he couldn't believe that there was nothing he could do, he couldn't believe that that was it, that he would never see Monica again, that he would never see his unborn child.

Then, he realized it was really happening. Some guys tried to go downstairs to see if there was anything that could be done but Chandler knew that the firemen were doing all they could and, also, that he had to do something really more important. He rushed to his office and picked his cellphone and dialed he and Monica's apartment.

The other were following Monica out when suddenly, the phone rang.  
"That must be Chandler apologizing. That's okay, I'll get his message later." Monica said.  
"It could be important." Joey said and picked up the phone. "Hello?"  
"Joey?" He heard Chandler's voice at the other end.  
"Hey man! You wanna talk to Monica?"  
"Please…"  
"Mon, it's Chandler!"  
"I don't wanna talk to him." Monica answered.  
"She doesn't want to talk to you." Joey repeated.  
"Is she there? It's really REALLY important. Put the voice speaker on."  
Joey did as was told and everybody could hear Chandler's voice. Monica sighed and came near the phone.  
"Monica?"  
"Yes!"  
"Monica, my love, I have some very bad news. But, above all, I want you to know that I'll always love you no matter what and that you'll be in my heart until the last moment and that I'm really sorry for what happened today. I didn't mean it. You know, I would give my life just to be able to see you right now."

Concerned took place instead of anger on Monica's face. She sat down besides the phone, really worried. All the others sat around her, carefully listening at what he was telling her.  
"Chandler, you're kind of freaking me out."  
"It won't be easy to hear, sweetie… but, my building is on fire." Chandler said really quickly. What was hurting him the most was the pain that Monica will feel.  
"What? Are you okay?"  
"Hum… I'm for now. But, you see, the fire began in the fifth level and is slowly coming up. The firemen can't do anything about it and there is no escape…"  
"Chandler, tell me it's a joke, please tell me it's a joke!" Monica had never been as frightened: her biggest fear was coming true. Then, she heard Chandler crying and she knew it was over.

Chandler tried to contain himself but as he said those words, it hit him harder: it was true, that was the last time he would ever talk to one of his friend or to the love of his life… He began crying harder and harder:  
"Monica, I'm so sorry. I love you. I love you all guys, you were the greatest friends…a man…a man could dream of." Chandler continued sobbing.

They all looked at each other. They couldn't believe what Chandler told them was true, they couldn't believe he was out there dying, they couldn't believe they would never see one of their best friends ever again. Rachel threw up, Ross just stared into space, Phoebe balanced back and forth and Joey screamed. Monica just stared at the phone.  
"Guys, it's a great thing I can say goodbye to all of you before… you know… leaving. Not so much men have that chance."  
"Yeah! We're really lucky!" Mon dropped, sarcastically.  
Chandler laughed between his sobs:  
"I will miss you, Mon. But, don't forget, we'll see each other soon. You have to believe that: I know it's true because whoever is up there wouldn't want us to be separated forever. We love each other too much for that, don't we, my love?"  
"Yes, we do." Monica answered crying all her heart. "Yes, we do. I'll miss you too sweetie and I will always love you no matter what happened."  
"Raise our child, Mon. And, continue your life, you don't have to stop because of me. Go on…"  
"I don't know if I'll be able to do that, sweetheart. I'm not sure I can go on without you."  
"I'll always be there for you, Mon. And, I want you to know that I have always loved you, even before London…since the first…actually the second time I saw you, I had this big crush on you and if I was afraid of commitment, it was because I knew I only belong to you."  
"I have never and will never love anyone as much as I love you, Chandler."  
"Man, you can't leave me." Joey intervened. "You just can't! There are so much things I want to do with you!" Joey was crying like a baby. He was screaming inside. He never thought he could be in that much pain.  
"I know, Jo. I'll miss you too…You were the best bud a guy could have. You have always been there for me, Jo and that's why I have to ask you a favor…"  
"What? You can ask me anything…"  
"Take care of Monica and our child, take care of them and make sure nothing happens to them and that no one hurts them, okay?"  
"Of course, man! Of course…" Joey's voice broke down as Joey stopped crying. His face became blank like nothing worse could ever happened to him.  
"Ch…Chandler?" Ross asked, still not sure all of this was really real. He looked at his sister: she was crying quite calmly, considering the situation, holding by Rachel who was, herself, trying to make her best friend feel better, without thinking about the situation because that was too painful.  
"Ross?"

Chandler still holding onto his phone stood up as he heard some screaming and walked to his office's entry. He looked at the scene around him: most people were just sitting on the floor, crying or staring into space. Some others were still trying to find a way out even though everybody knew it was useless. Three or four were fighting because they were all trying to get to the place they thought was the safer, a man even pushed a woman hard on the floor. But the screaming didn't came from there… the screaming came from a man who had decided to jump by the window instead of waiting for the fire just there.  
"Oh my god!" Chandler said. He couldn't quite believe that some people would react like this.  
"Ross? I'm listening to you…" But Chandler's mind was wandering to some scary place where he realized in one hour maximum, he would be dead. He realized he would never see the sky again, never see the city, never just hang out in the coffee place, in Monica's arms discussing with his friends about a stupid topic… He was so scared and felt so powerless. It was making him sick that he knew that death was coming slowly and that he couldn't do anything about it. He had never been so scared in his entire life.

Monica was in Rachel's arms, crying. However, she wasn't feeling Rachel's arms around her, she wasn't feeling anything right now. She couldn't believe that she was hearing her husband for the last time of her life. She just wanted to hold back time. It was killing her… knowing he could die any second right now, knowing she could still hear him right at this moment but that, that night, she would already be alone. She couldn't live like that. Chandler's death will kill her!

"Hey…" She heard Ross' voice say to her husband. "Chandler, you are the greatest guy I've ever met and…and…"Ross began crying too and she could hear that that made Chandler burst once again crying. "I'm sorry, man. I just wanted to say that you have always been and will always be into my heart and that I'm so so happy to be your brother and that that's the place you will always hold in my heart."  
"Thanks man." She heard Chandler answered as tears were still rolling down his face. "You are the greatest paleontologist I've met too."

A small smile came to Ross' face but he quickly crumbled onto the floor.  
"Mon…Monica?" Chandler called with some desperation in his voice. Monica picked up the phone so that the voice speaker won't be on for a moment.  
"Yes, sweetie?"  
"Mon, I know it's not really the right time for you now but I really need you."  
"Chandler, I'm there, I'll always be there. If I could, I would join you in that damn building so that we could live our last moments together."  
"Mon, I'm so scared, I'm so scared. I know I should be strong to tell you all goodbye but I can't anymore, the scene here is too terrible…"  
"Oh, Chandler, don't worry… I'm there, I'll always be there. Each time you'll be by my side, I'll feel you. I promise you, Chandler, death cannot part us."  
"I love you so much, I can't believe I'll never see you again."  
"We'll see each other again, Chandler, I know we will. Because, without knowing that, I wouldn't be able to go on living."  
Monica put the voice speaker back on. Rachel sat down next to it:  
"Chandler?"  
"Rach? How are you? Is your baby okay?" Rachel was already seven-month pregnant with Ross.  
"Yeah, Chandler, he is." She looked at Ross before continuing: "I was actually going to talk to you about that… Chandler, would you like to be my daughter's godfather?"

Chandler laughed hearing that and looked at the people crying or screaming around him:  
"I'm not that sure that would be a so good idea, Rach. Your daughter's godfather has to be there for her when she can't stand you two anymore… and that's gonna happen in not a very long time, I think…"

"No, Chandler, she could always go to her godmother, Monica." Monica looked at her and smiled, a sad smile though.

"And," Rachel continued "You would be the best godfather for her, you would be close to God so that you will be able to intervene at anytime for her. She'll have the best angel watching over her she could have." Saying this, Rachel broke down and silent tears rolled on her cheeks as she realized what was happening.

"Then, it will be an honor, Rach."  
The five friends had all realized now that it was true, that they should say goodbye to him now or they will never. They all gathered around the phone holding onto one another.

Chandler wandered in his office passing by people who didn't pay him any attention even though he has known them for years… He went to a window and looked through it. He was able to see all New York City but, below him, was a lot of smoke and he could see some flames too. Tears were rolling down his cheeks, however he didn't even realized it. He would miss this town so much… He would miss everything in his life, things that hadn't even mattered, things that he had taken for granted.

"Guys, Mon?"  
"Yeah?"  
"I just wanted to tell you that I don't want you to cry for me or regretted me or anything. I'm just you annoying friend, Chandler. Instead, every moment you would spend thinking about me or anything, just spend it looking at how lucky you are, at how life is bright and beautiful, at all the wonders around you."  
"Chandler, life's not bright: it can't be without you!" Monica replied.  
"Mon, my love, you have a child, you have friends and a family, you have had a husband, you have known what it is to love and be loved back. Not everyone is that lucky, Mon. Since today, you'll have a special part-time angel!"

Monica smiled.  
"Part-time?"  
"Of course, now, I'll be able to see everything that's happening: the gossiper's dream and I'll also have to watch our child and Ross and Rachel's one to make sure they don't have trouble."  
"Oh! Yeah! That…" Monica laughed through her tears.  
"You don't have to forget me but don't give up now. Just think about all the things you're not missing each day you're alive."

Chandler looked at the people around him who were, some of them, so scared they'd rather give up on life sooner than waiting for their destiny. He thought he would break up again while he was advising his friends to live, as himself couldn't. But he wasn't feeling sorry for himself anymore. It wasn't time to regret but just to help the others -and the love of his life- to live better afterwards…

Afterwards… after his death: that's what "afterwards" is but none of that mattered right at this moment. What hurt him the most was that Monica might be in pain for a very long time and that was the last thing he wanted. Who was he kidding? The last thing he wanted was to give up onto life so soon… too soon.  
He went on speaking with his friends trying hard to forget what couldn't be stopped.

All five of them were hugging each other, holding on to Chandler's voice.  
All around Chandler, the people were calming down. Most of them were sitting down, thinking or talking in a low voice. Terror could still be read in some people's eyes but nobody was letting it control himself. The silence was almost total…  
Chandler was speaking in a very low voice too with his friends, telling them how much they all meant to him.

Suddenly, they could hear, through the phone, Chandler's boss' voice:  
"Hey folks! I've gone downstairs to see where the fire was and I'm afraid to announce that it is taking slowly the forty-eighth level and that I think it will arrive here in about five minutes…"  
"NO! No! Noooooo!" Monica screamed, realization falling on her. "Chandler? Please, tell me all of this was a joke, please, it can't be true… I won't be mad if it is a joke! Chandler?"  
Ross took his sister into his arms to try and calm her down.

Chandler heard his wife screaming and began to cry. The people around him weren't really reacting. Some of them stood up and tried to see if there was any way to get safe… but there wasn't and it wasn't a joke as well.  
"Mon, I loved you so much…"  
"No, don't use past tenses, Chandler, just don't! This can't be it! I need you, I can't live without you!"

'How do you love someone  
That hurts you oh so bad  
With intentions good  
Was all he ever had

But how do I let go when I've  
Loved him for so long and I've  
Given him all that I could?  
Maybe love is a hopeless crime  
Giving up what seems your lifetime  
What went wrong with something once so good?'

"I couldn't have lived without you either, Mon, I couldn't have… but I'll always be there with you, with all of you, guys. You have all made me happy, I couldn't thank you enough."  
"Man! Don't leave, don't!" He heard Joey screamed.

'How do you find the words to say  
To say goodbye  
If your heart don't have the heart to say  
To say goodbye'

"Joey…" Chandler didn't have the courage to tell them all not to break up… Why did he have to do that? He wasn't strong enough… But he had to do it.  
"To all of you, goodbye, I'll see you later, in a lifetime. Be sure I 'm grateful and you don't have anything to regret."  
He needed to tell them goodbye. He knew he would eventually have to do that and that was the time: no time left to close your eyes and imagine you will see them again, no time left to get your hopes up… No time left.

"Chandler?" Monica's soft voice said. Just one word from her could break his heart.

'Is this the end? Are you sure?  
How should you know when you've never been here before?  
It's so hard to just let go  
When this is the one and only love I've ever known'

"I'll love you for ever. This is the most horrible thing I've ever lived but I can promise you I'll get over it for our child's sake and I'll raise it with all my love and I'll see you again soon."  
"Thanks, my love." Chandler was still crying but was happy she said that." That was the thing I wanted to hear."  
"I know." Monica knew that and she also knew that she had to stay compose until the end for him, for his sake.

'But how do I let go when I've  
Loved him for so long and I've  
Given him all that I could?  
Was it something wrong that we did  
Because others infiltrated  
What went wrong with something once so good'

"There are so many things I still have to tell you, so many things I have to live with you."  
"I know, sweetie, but don't worry, I'm sure you'll be there with us."  
"Sweetie?"  
"Yes…"  
"I shouldn't have shouted this morning, I really don't think you're selfish, you know that…"  
Monica laughed: it was so Chandler to think about apologizing for something like that whereas it didn't mattered anymore.  
"I know, I'm sorry too."

They could hear shouting through the phone and a lot of nose was made. Obviously, the building was being destroyed.  
"Chandler? Chandler…"  
No answer…  
So, that was it.  
That was how it feels like.

'So how do you find the words to say  
To say goodbye?  
If your heart don't have the heart to say  
To say goodbye.'


End file.
